The full says to my title is – “The World only exists in your Eyes. You can make it as big or as small as you want.” I love this saying for really, anyone. Those of us with Asperger’s, this should be a great reminder of how our life needs to be! Yes, our view of the world is different than other people who don’t have our condition but, we shouldn’t be shunned or closed off because of our view of the world. We have our own freewill, do not let anyone else tell you other wise! Bullies favorite thing to do is to dictate how you need to see the world. This is that form of control that makes me angry at people who try to pull this stupid stunt. Growing up, I lived my life with one bully or another telling me, what I should do and how to do it. The only time you should ever listen to anyone about the view of the world are those people who deeply love you the way you are. What those people will do is, kind of like Aladdin, show you a new wonderful world of possibilities. That’s not pushing you down, that’s opening you up. That opening is healthy for all of us. My wife has been doing that with me and I’ve been so grateful for her love that she shows me.
Of course make the world the way you see it, there is nothing wrong with that. Just be willing to let loved ones open your mind to new experiences, places, things. Fear is going to be the one thing that is going to hold you back, that is what bullies use, don’t let it get the best of you. It’s YOUR life, not theirs so live it and let nothing hold you back!
“Wisdom speaks the right words, at the right time, from the right person, in the right way.”
This was a quote that was used in a sermon at my church several Sunday’s ago. I think why I felt compelled to write about this is because it as a lot to say. It’s already known that many people with high functioning Asperger’s tend to show signs of high intelligence. I know this is not true for everyone, and remember we are not all savants. My age is pushing up there, but I believe my level of wisdom as increased as well. I will state that there might be a lot of smart people, but not all of them are wise. So enters my opening quote because there are several elements in play. If you read it correctly, the quote is describing words, time, person, and way. Not just any kind, but the ‘right’ kind. So the question is – What is right? Simply put, the right is anything that that offers sound, helpful information.
The information could be anything from an excellent suggestion of some course of action, an affirmation for encouragement, a reaffirming idea that you’re doing the right thing. It could be any number of good ideas or thoughts that would benefit you. There might even be a time when this actually happened. I imagine, there were times when it sounded good, but ended up being a terrible mistake. I believe the only way to know is your use of good judgement. You maybe right or maybe wrong. This has happened to me on a number of occasions. Right now, I’m learning the process of self-publishing and I’m trying to get as much information as I possibly can. Try to keep this in mind as you live your life. It never hurts to question any opinion or advice you might receive. I know I find myself doing this about every single day.
Obviously in the months of May and June, graduation celebrations are happening all over the United States. Thus the gathering of parents, family and friends congregate to show their support for that person or persons who be receiving their certificate they earned through the hard work in their particular school. Now, I will need to define my terms, ceremonial you all get as I just described but, Etiquette is defined by: (noun) “the customary code of polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group.” [Dictionary.com] Having sat through a college and high school graduation this year  my observations on this lost art will be grim.
Since I have Asperger’s I need you to note that I’m not fond of loud noises, having a routine, making sure everyone is doing the job they were assigned to do and large crowds. Witnessing the two celebrations, I can truly say that this lack of etiquette is not an economic status or a racial one; I believe this is due to lack of education. At this point, I can only speculate as to why we ended up with a full generation of people who have a lack of respect for those who are trying to run the ceremony. I am completely for cheering on your graduate when their name is called, but a prolonged screaming or chanting is just a little over the top. I’ve also noticed more people just shouting out the name of their graduate during a time of information or a certain speech that has nothing to do with the person. I find attending these functions to be more difficult every time. I really want to be there and support my graduate but, people standing up right in front of you to take a picture and stay standing or the random shouting is starting to take it’s toll on me. I find myself having to take medication just to keep my nerves in check because remember, it’s not just all of the annoying chatter, but there generally tend to be a lot of people stuffed into either an arena or an auditorium. I believe we’ve come to a point were people don’t care about the manner in which that behave. Maybe this is one those ‘entitlement’ things that they have a right to act like this even though every program I’ve ever read clearly states the proper behavior that needs to be followed. The root of the whole ceremony is respecting those who earned this moment. Not a time for people to try to steal away the graduates time to miss getting to hear their name called.
As an educator and having taught for a long time, we strive to help students understand the material that they need to learn. Of course, not all students learn the same way, in education we call this differentiated learning. Some students are visual, some are auditory and others are self read. Many students need the actually doing of, to grasp the understanding of a concept; hands on activities. Many times, there will be students who have a hard time learning the material like other students normally can. These, learning disabilities, are just a part of any teachers awareness for their students. As of late, I have felt that autism as been a little bit over diagnosed. Even though the student may have OCD or ADHD, this doesn’t qualify them as autistic. I can say though since I do have the actual diagnoses of Asperger’s Syndrome, it’s not too difficult for me to spot another person with the same disorder. There was a time when I had to have this talk with a parent about my concerns for their child because he had all of the calling cards for Asperger’s but, the father was refusing to get him tested. So, I turned to mom who had her suspicions but, she wasn’t too sure if she should have had her son tested or not. I told her she really needed to get him tested so he could receive the proper support he would need to be successful in school. I don’t know if she ever followed through but, I’d like to think she probably did. I’m noticing there really is a fine line between people who really are autistic and those who only have maybe one disability thus slapping the wrong label on the person to inflate numbers. Yes, there have been times when I had a student who was labelled autistic but, after hours of observation in the classroom I had some serious doubts about the diagnose. We really need to be careful.
I realize this might be a bit of an odd title but, I’ll explain what I mean and remember; this is an aspie talkin’ here. Back on May the 5th, I was shopping at Target and to my excitement, I found a fidget cube. Not just any cube but, a Spider-Man cube! I’ve seen the spinners and I thought those were pretty cool but, really impractical to me. The fidget cubes have been around however, they were rather expensive. I really liked the cube and knew it would be very useful to me since I feel like I need something in my hand all the time! Once I spotted the Spider-Man there was no turning back…plus it was rather inexpensive. Ironically, late that evening I had the chance to finally go see the movie Avengers: Endgame. When you grow up from a child to an adult and only getting to see DC comic heroes on the big screen with no Marvel in site, it was a bit depressing. Ever since Marvel finally came on like a massive bulldozer, they have just crushed the competition. So I’ll have to admit when I saw the first Avenger’s movie, I was prided up with joying knowing this was something I had wished to see when I was a kid.
I realize that April was Autism Awareness month and right now as I write this…it’s May. The reason I waited is because during the month of April, there are several news stories and lots of media that surround our disorder but, then what? It’s not like I have Asperger’s for a month then it goes away! Don’t get me wrong, I’m very happy that there is an entire month dedicated to the awareness of Autism. I guess I wonder, once the lights have gone down and the press head off to the newer stories to be told…does anyone that doesn’t have this disorder care any more? For us, this will always be a constant battle on the idea of is anyone really aware? I try my best to self advocate for any reason, just to remind people that I’m a little off and I’m not like everyone else. I almost feel like I need to wear a reflective vest that says ‘Caution, I’m autistic.’ The problem is regular people treat other people like they are all the same. Unless the people visibly see that I might be in a wheelchair or missing an appendage, they don’t see the disability in me. Autism Awareness is really, an all year event. This is a battle myself and many others have to deal with every day.
In this blog, my goal is to address any concerns I receive from readers and/or talk about different thing that either directly or indirectly deal with my disorder. I welcome any comments or question you might have. I have finish one book as I’m currently writing this entry but, I’ve already started the early stages of a second book. There is so much literature out in our world about autism but, sadly some people miss the mark. I believe this happens because the people who are writing these things either think they know everything or do but, don’t have the disorder so they only go by observations on a few people. If you ask me what bothers me the most, it’s probably the people who think they have all the answers but, have no background to truly the right to say anything at all. Yes, I do disagree with some people who have the same condition I do but, this is just a matter of a different point of view. So welcome! Enter at your leisure.